The Gay Kama Sutra is a guide for gay sex that I collected from different sources. I hope that it can be useful for the new guys who are starting their gay life, and I’m sure that active gays could find some new ideas and tips there.
Things to know
All about Testicles – part 1
All about Testicles – part 2
Gay Sex: Opening New Horizons
The Erotic Art of Tantra
First date tips
Saunas Bathhouses & Arcades
Kiss, is just a kiss
Right ? Wrong!
The key to good kissing is to actively use your lips. I’ve kissed guys that didn’t use their lips at all. They would just tense up their lips and leave them like that. It felt like I was trying to kiss a statue.
Relax or at least, make a mental effort to relax, your lips. Allow them to be soft and pliable. As you start to kiss, try gently brushing your partner’s cheek with them, or run them along his neck just barely making contact with his skin.
Don’t be afraid to use your breath. Nothing gets me hotter than feeling someone’s warm breath on my neck, or someone gently (and I mean gently) blowing in my ear. It always sends goose bumps down my neck, back, and arms.
This type of gentle foreplay with your partner is extremely sensual, and builds up sexual tension. It can also serve to establish nonverbal communication between the two of you. His reactions to this sort of foreplay will give your first indications of his overall sexual responsiveness.
As you get into it, you’ll probably start using your tongue. Run or flick your tongue across his lips, moistening them slightly without actually kissing him. When you do finally kiss, make sure to lick your own lips from time to time to ensure their softness. It’s not very pleasant to kiss someone whose lips have the texture of sandpaper.
When you use your tongue on his neck, gently run it around his earlobe and ear. If you feel like it, suck on his earlobe – but not his ear. You may want to cover his entire ear with your mouth and gently exhale. Try not to inhale while doing this, and don’t exhale too quickly because the rushing air will make him feel like he’s in a wind tunnel.
When starting to “French” kiss, open your mouth just slightly. I can’t tell you how many times I went to French someone and he opened his mouth widely sticking his tongue all the way out. I felt like I was Frenching a horse. You’re trying to kiss here … not eat a Big Mac!
Let your partner accept the tip of your tongue into his mouth, and vice versa. As you get more intense try sucking lightly on your partner’s tongue – be careful not to suck too hard, making him feel like you’re trying to rip his tongue from his mouth.
Try gently nibbling or sucking on your partner’s lips. Feel their texture, softness, and even their taste with your tongue. Though it’s generally subtle and easily unnoticed, the lips of different men do actually have their own unique flavour. Be a creative kisser.
Always be aware of your teeth. It’s not really pleasant to be French kissing someone and feeling his teeth scrape the area around your mouth. Though teeth can effectively be used for fun. A light bite or nibble on your partner’s chin can be a display of passionate sexual aggression 🙂
Most guys kiss with their eyes closed. Ignore the impulse to close your eyes when kissing and try opening them occasionally. It adds a new perspective to the experience.
Some commonly sensitive areas are – love handles, the insides of thighs, the belly button, nipples, armpits, the small of the back, backs of knees, and so on. The “hot spots” vary greatly from one guy to another, as do degrees of sensitivity. Again, closely read his feedback, or he may end up being bored when you’re earnestly doing your best to stimulate him.
Once again don’t be afraid to use your imagination – be creative, be playful, have fun with it. If you make an effort to be in-tune with your partner, chances are he’ll return the favour and both of you will have a better time.
If you’re a guy that says, “kissing is not my thing”, then you’ve just wasted about 5 to 10 minutes of your time reading this.
All about Testicles – part 1
1. Producing sperm (spermatozoa)
2. Producing male sex hormones, (testosterone is the best-known hormone)
A very common question is about the differences in the size of the balls. It’s rarely that both testicles identical. In fact the left one hangs lower in 85% of cases. It is nothing to worry about.
Sometimes you may feel pain in your testicles. Intermittent twinges in the testicles are common and these sometimes happen after the intercourse or if you are very horny but don’t cum. If it lasts less than a minute then there is nothing to worry. An infection or inflammation causes testicular pain that builds up gradually. In such cases consult your doctor.
The testicles are very gentle organs, so when you play with a couple, be gentle!
So what can you do with it?
Removing Testicle hair
Whatever you’re reasons for removing your testicle hair; the most importance that you do it properly. You can do Waxing but I’m certain you’ve heard the horror stories associated with ripping the hair out of your body from the root. I’m here to tell you that it really is as painful as “they” say. Depilatory cream is a lotion that you place over the hair for a few minutes, and then, when you wash it off the hair is gone… but it’s not recommended for sensitive areas and It may cause acne or rashes in the area. You can use Electrolysis or laser but it cost a lot of money and it’s not for shy guys – a professional cosmetician must do it. So… my recommendation is shaving.
The scrotal skin is quite soft, and more importantly, paper thin, so the key thing to remember when you shave your testicle – BE CAREFUL. You’ll need an easy and clear view of your scrotum to be able to do the best testicle shaving. Create a space with comfortable seating in front of a mirror, and a table or something on the side where you can place a container of warm water to rinse your razor and a clean dry towel. Allow your razor to soak in the warm water for a short while before you start testicle shaving.
It’s probably a good idea to place a towel underneath you and you’ll definitely need good lighting. Make sure there’s enough light to see the individual hairs on your scrotum before you begin your testicle shaving. Slowly and gently, stretch and flatten the skin of the scrotum with one hand and shave towards the inner thigh with the other. Make as few repeat strokes as possible and don’t press down on the razor during testicle shaving.
Over his lifetime, a man’s risk of testicular cancer is roughly 1 in 250 (four tenths of one percent, or 0.4%). It is most common among males aged 15-40 years, particularly those in their mid-twenties. Testicular cancer has one of the highest cure rates of all cancers: in excess of 90%; essentially 100% if it has not metastasized. Even for the relatively few cases in which malignant cancer has spread widely, chemotherapy offers a cure rate of at least 85% today. Not all lumps on the testicles are tumors, and not all tumors are malignant; there are many other conditions such as Epididymal cysts, Hydatid of Morgagni, and so on which may be painful but are non-cancerous. It should be emphasized however that all unusual lumps or pain in the testicles should be checked by a doctor immediately.
All about Testicles – part 2
In part 1, I gave you some general information about Testicles, some tips about removing the hair from it and about Testicular cancer. Now it’s about the time to check what and how to enjoy the testicles in sex.
Use your mouth
Start with your tongue under the back of his balls. Gently flicking your tongue back and forth, go over his balls toward the front of the base of his penis, then give him a nice slow lick along the bottom of the shaft all the way to the tip. Lick from the bottom of his balls to the base of the penis. Lick his balls and get them really wet, suck on them, suck his testicles into your mouth ever so gently.
Some guys like to feel tooth on their balls. If your guy is like that, move your open mouth on the testicle with the tooth exposed. Make sure not to take a bite!
Use your hands
Tickle his balls with the tip of your fingers; move them all around the balls. Make sure your fingers and his balls are not sweaty. You can also rub them gently. Place your open palm beneath it, and close it around is slowly and gently. Guys like the feeling of the worm around their balls
Some guys like it when you pushing their balls up toward the base of the penis. Place the balls in the center of your palm, close it like your holding a tomato, and push is slowly. You can push two fingers against the perineum (the area between the testicles and the anus) at the same time.
There are guys that like it when you pull their balls. Close your thumb and index finger around the base of the testicles (the place where they connect to the body) and pull it slowly. Make sure you make a small pulls. Look on your lover face; make sure you pull just as much as it makes him feel good!
A ball stretcher is a sex toy that is fastened around a man’s scrotum and rests on his testicles in order to elongate the scrotum and provides a feeling of weight and pleasure to the wearer.
Ball stretchers come in different forms: a rectangular piece of material (usually leather) that can be rolled into a tube shape and fastened with metal snaps, or a ring made of stainless steel split into two pieces which can be fastened together with screws. Both the leather and steel ball stretchers elongate the scrotum (from half an inch to 10 cm or more), but the steel also adds additional weight (from 230 grams to upwards of 2.3 kg). A hook attached to a ball stretcher can be used to add even more weight, sometimes up to 4.5 kg.
Stretching for short periods of time beyond what is comfortable either in length or weight can be both painful and pleasurable, and is one component of cock and ball torture.
Ball stretchers can be worn on a daily basis for long periods of time and will, over a period of months, permanently elongate the scrotum. However, since the scrotum is a relatively elastic piece of skin and frequently changes in length, the greater length may not readily apparent unless it is fully extended (for example, in hot weather). Leather ball stretchers are sometimes combined with a cock ring and attaching with metal snaps to the bottom of the ring.
Gay Sex: Opening New Horizons
What can prevent you from getting complete satisfaction? Believe it or not, this is your mind, your brains, your morals, your superstitions that do now allow you enjoy sex in all its variety. Your mind makes you concentrate on a problem: not intense orgasm, short or thin penis, weak erection, discrepancy in your and your partner’s desires, etc. How to free your mind, to stop worrying and to start getting pleasure?
Consider the following that will help you to free your mind and to explore new horizons in sex.
Keep in mind the following rule of satisfying sex: everything that gives pleasure to you and your partner is appropriate. Do not restrain yourself and do not think of what is good and what is bad. And, of course never say never. “I’ll never do this or that….” But why? Why do you think you’ll never like something you don’t like right now?
In fact your desires are very likely to depend on your partner. With this partner you never wanted to perform blowjob or fisting, but this doesn’t mean you won’t want to try these activities with someone else. Now you are mostly the giving partner, but some day you might want to switch the roles. Always be open for something new and untested.
Be sincere with yourself
What is your most daring fantasy? What turns you on? Try to answer this question maximum sincerely. Sometimes it so happens that we conceal our desires from ourselves, for various reasons. Some our fantasies seem to us too dirty or immoral. Some of them are not up to a certain image of good sex that we created in our mind.
Who said that orgasm is the guarantee of satisfaction? Sometimes activities that do not lead to orgasm might be much more satisfying. For instance sensual massage. May be you don’t experience a strong orgasm because you don’t need one right now? Explore your mind and find out more about your true deep, or even subconscious desires.
Find the right partner
Sex does not require great and everlasting love, but sex without any warm feelings is quite boring and in most cases dissatisfying. That is why you should ask yourself: do I have any good feelings this person or I just want sex? If you realize that your answer is: I want only sex and nothing more you should give up this partner. Thus you will get moral satisfaction and you will not associate sex with something immoral and something that has power over you.
How many partners should I have?
Some people think – the less partners, the better. Ideally, there should be only one partner throughout the life. There is another opinion: the more partners you have, the more satisfying your love life is. Perhaps both opinions are extremes.
Keep in mind that sex is not only physiological mechanism for getting pleasure. Sex is a specific way of communication of two persons. You cannot imagine a person who needs communication with all people he meets, and of course, you can hardly imagine a person who needs only one person for communication throughout his life. The truth is somewhere between two extremes.
Love your body
Keep in mind – there are no ugly bodies. Tastes differ. Someone might no like your body, whereas the other dreams of a partner with body like yours. Feelings are more important. The one who loves you loves your body, as it is your body, the body of the beloved person.
The Erotic Art of Tantra
If you want to take your sex life to another level, a higher level, then you might want to explore the joys of Tantric sex. Unzipped magazine talked with the experts on this stimulating and satisfying state of being. Hey, Sting isn’t the only one who can achieve day long orgasms! here is the result:
Welcome to the joys of tantric sex. You may remember Sting discussing this in interviews, reminiscing about marathon sessions where he screwed his wife for six nonstop hours. Well, the truth is, if he was practicing tantra, he probably did. However, this does not mean he was pounding away like a jackhammer for six hours in a row. It means his feeling of sexual bliss, his orgasmic state, continued for hours and hours and hours. With this thought making our mouth water, we sought out an expert.
Bigger, Longer, Uncut Sex
Dr. Barnaby Barratt, Director of The Center for Tantric Spirituality, explains that the entire idea of orgasm is expanded through Tantric practice. “There is a distinction between sexual ejaculate and orgasm. It’s not just about squirt, squirt; it’s about the full body sensation. In popular culture, people confuse ejaculate with orgasm. The disadvantage of ejaculate is that there is a refractory period, the time it takes to get hard again after coming. If you don’t ejaculate, the orgasm intensity can go on and on for a period of time. It is possible to remain in an orgasmic state for six or eight hours. But that involves resting–perhaps while the penis is still inserted–while the movement of sexual energy is maintained. It doesn’t mean humping and pumping; it means an intimate connection. The orgasm goes on and on and is intense and full-bodied. It comes on as a non-ordinary state of consciousness.”
The roots of Tantra originate in East Asia as a combination of yoga, meditation, ritual and eroticism. As defined by Dr. Barratt, “Tantra is a spritual practice between the individual and the universe. It embraces our energy of the body, including our sensual energy, and aligns us with the sacredness of the universe. It’s not about faith, but experiencing the sensuality of living here and now in our bodies.”
When he was 24, writer Michael Shinafelt experienced this fantastic sensuality. “I saw an ad in the newspaper for a practice model for an erotic massage. I was enticed by getting paid to get a massage,” he remembers. “It was a great experience. The whole class was naked. I was laying on this bed, naked and being demonstrated on. It was interesting. It was all about the body and circulating energy. It was a hands-on teaching, so I had all these hands touching me. With the energy circulating and with all the touching, of course I popped a boner. The teacher spent about the last ten minutes actually touching my penis, and it brings all the energy to the genitals. He started tugging on it. It felt like I came, but it was an ingasm. Then the teacher finished me. Ultimately when I came, the orgasm was huge.”
While Shinafelt doesn’t practice Tantra regularly, he remembers the experience very positively. “It was part of my awakening,” he says. “I did involve some Tantric sex in my relationship [at the time]. We did a some experimentation, but it is time-consuming. It’s something you have to really want to do. I just want to enjoy sex and not worry about breathing. It’s not for me, but it was a great experience.”
Intense Focus, Intense Finish
The extraordinary experience of Tantra does require a level of extra concentration, but the good news is that you can choose to include Tantra into sexuality on an occasional basis. “Tantra makes sexuality more honoring, but you need to be careful,” says Dr. Barratt. “That doesn’t mean it’s not hot or doesn’t involve cruising. That’s not what I mean. It can be a quick, casual encounter. It makes the whole experience more honoring of self, of the other person, and the universe. It doesn’t necessarily encourage only monogamous, married relationships.”
Tantric coach and regular blogger Austino agrees that Tantra is “a heightened experience you can create over and over again with yourself, with a regular partner, or with a casual partner. In many ways, Tantra …
First date tips
First of all, don’t be nervous. First date is just a first date. The worst thing that can happen to you is that you won’t see him again.
Chose a place that you know best, where you feel comfortable and will be able to talk without disturbance. It can be a restaurant or a bar.
Other public places such as cinema or a football match can be too public to have enough time to talk in quiet.
First impression is very strong; this fact was known long ago. Don’t ignore to care about your appearance. Clean clothes and underwear, pleasant scent would do the best.
If you don’t know his clothing tastes well, it would be better to put on something that is not so extravagant, not mentioning that it should suit the situation.
At the beginning of your date you may feel rather confused, worrying about what is going on in his mind, did you make a good impression or not and so on.
Believe me, he is thinking the same things.
You can discuss anything, more important is “how” than “what”. Listen to him attentively, but remember that behind words stay real emotions.
Intonation and gestures tell more about him than words actually. Use your eyes, they are much more expressive, and trust your intuition.
Don’t go too far in your expectations; you can never be sure if he is a guy of your dream, especially because he can turn out to be not what your imagination has drawn so colorfully.
If you are not sure about his sex orientation, it would be better not to make him face the naked truth just at once: “I’m a gay. Let’s start.”
Try to gather as much information about him as possible, for example you can find out what he really thinks of gays by discussing related topics in films or TV programs, where he can tell his opinion.
And you should always weigh possible consequences and chances before. Even if he will turn out to be a heterosexual, you may stay friends at least.
Patterns of pubic hair vary. On some individuals, pubic hair is thick and/or coarse, while on others it may be sparse and/or fine. Hair texture varies from tightly curled to entirely straight. Pubic hair patterns can also vary by race and ethnicity.
Attitudes toward pubic hair are similar to those regarding axillary armpit hair in that cultural and personal norms can be reflected in reactions ranging from pleasure to revulsion, both for the presence and absence of such hair. As with any sexually charged matter there are persons of both sexes who have strong points of view toward the culturally related issues associated with presence or lack of body hair.
Self sucking (Autofellatio) is the act of sucking one’s own penis. It is very difficult to do and can only be performed by about 1% of the world male population. That’s of course don’t stop you from trying, ha!
Now, the Question… wouldn’t it be a little uncomfortable for you guys and would it actually be worth it?
Well, it’s sure looks good!
Do it yourself: Auto-fellatio with PVC Pipe
Step 1: Lube up some PVC pipe
Note, this could be dangerous, so please proceed with caution:
Take a piece of pvc pipe insulation and cut it the right length to fit your dick. It should be tight so no air will leak out.
Step 2: Pump and suck
Start pumping your dick and suck on pipe at the same time until you’re really to cum.
Or keep going, if you’d like a taste.
The ultimate in safe sex — self-performed oral pleasure at any hour of the day! If you’ve ever dreamed about this practice, this book can make your fantasy a reality. Packed with photos, advice, stories and training tips by men who know what they’re doing!
Forgive the hype: this is also a serious examination of the history (through a variety of reports) and application of self-performed oral sex. It’s both a fascinating examination of social perceptions and cultural mores, and a guide to specifics.
The response to Gary Griffin’s first groundbreaking book, Penis Enlargement Methods was so enthusiastic that his readers asked for more, prompting research in other related areas. This eventually resulted in a complete catalog of thirteen books. The goal is to take the mystery and taboo out of male sexuality and to help every man by providing factual information about his body and its function. As the Executive Director of the American Academy of Phalloplasty Surgeons, Gary Griffin witnessed an amazing increase in interest in the subject of male sexuality that shows no signs of abating. We appreciate your business and hope you enjoy our books. We look forward to hearing your comments and ideas for other books.
Saunas Bathhouses & Arcades
Probably one of the greatest differences between the gay and straight world is the existence of gay sex saunas and bathhouses. Originating in centuries past when the bath houses of Europe were places of extreme grandeur and beauty where men went to bathe in hot springs and be waited on by either young men or women, Gay Sex venues have once again become an accepted part of the gay society.
Almost every major city and town has at least one place which is designed for liaisons between gay men, whether it be a purpose built bathhouse or sauna, a bookshop with a video arcade, an adult theater or other venue. Sex venues are very popular with the gay community because it allows anonymous encounters among like minded men. Many of these venues attract a clientele that is both openly gay and also married men who live two quite distinct sexual lives.
In the early eighties gay sex venues were almost universally condemned as a breeding place of the HIV / Aids virus. However as more was discovered about the virus and ways to practice safer sex, the venue once again melted back into the shadowy world of the gay scene and have flourished ever since.
Who goes there?
In reality a lot of men go to the gay sex venues, whether they be single, taken, married, bisexual or just curious. All sorts of men go, there is no one generic type and on any night or day of the week you can be assured that a wide cross section of the community may be enjoying themselves in one of these venues.
Is there a code of conduct?
There is no written code of conduct for these venues, although each one will have a slightly different unwritten code of behavior and cruising. In the main men cruise each other in hallways, steam rooms pools, saunas and Jacuzzis. They do not go there as a “social” occasion instead they generally keep to themselves except for picking up obviously. Sex is conducted in public, private or in a variety of group or other situations. Each venue will have a slightly different theme, from Roman Baths, the S&M dungeons.
How do I find them?
You can usually find them listed in the gay newspapers and magazines and in many places listed in the telephone directory as well.
In these venues upon entry you are given a towel and a locker key. You undress in the he locker area and then cruise through the venue. The venue may have, a sauna, steam room, private cubicles, maybe a coffee shop, a dark room or maze, video rooms showing non stop gay porn and sometimes a gym or a pool.
Men openly cruise each other as they wander through these places. When they see a person they like eye contact or a light brush of the hand passing is used to indicate interest. Then they may follow each other to a private cubicle or even just go for it in the he corridor if that takes their fancy.
Be aware that sitting in the Jacuzzi may find yourself approached by someone using the cover of the water to make their approach. If you are the object of unwanted attention be polite but firm and gently shake your head or gently remove their hand.
Most if not all saunas and bathhouses will provide a steady supply of condoms and lubricant throughout the venue.
Adult theaters are incredible popular and are also available for the straight male community. They usually have a number of small theaters showing non stop gay and straight porn. Many of these venues also have dark rooms where men can go as well.
Men sit and watch the movies while other men cruise through the he back of the theaters. If you see someone you are interested in, you may sit next to them (or they may sit next to you). Gentle groping can lead to full on sex in seats, or may end up in a more private setting.
Not all adult theaters have a ready supply of condoms and lube. Many provide them on entry and you will need to make sure that you have a supply before you enter. Adult theaters do not generally have showers so you cannot fully clean up after an encounter.
Video arcades are usually found at the back of adult shops and provide a small booths with a selection of videos that can be played for a small amount of money, either coin or token operated. In most cases before you enter you have to buy a certain number of tokens. The booths sometimes have a gloryhole between them. While some are large enough for two people to fit in at a squeeze. Video arcades are very popular with closeted and married guys, as they are located in straight adult shops as well, so the men have an excuse for being in the store.
There are an assortment of other types of sex venues such as mazes, dungeons and simple cubicles at the back of sex stores. They operate on the he same principle as Video arcades except many may also have private booths and rooms for encounters.
There are many ways for men to find and have sex with anonymous men and sex clubs are just one of the many. Be careful though because often in the heat of the moment you may end up there drunk and not in full control. It is always best to visit these places free of alcohol and drugs so you can make decisions about what you do and don’t do. And always practice safe sex!
Not all cities and towns have legal venues and it is at your responsibility that you visit such a venue. If you are in doubt about the legality of a venue ask before entering!
Be careful though, as sometimes only one of the couple may be pushing for the threesome and you can end up in the middle of one God Damn almighty row! But once you have met a couple, been picked up by one then go for it if you find them both attractive.
Guys in a relationship will generally know each other’s likes and dislikes in bed pretty well, and they often have defined roles, i.e. top or bottom. They might be looking for someone who is versatile, for example you to be the meat in the sandwich, or they might just be looking for pretty vanilla action, like sucking, kissing etc.
If you are new to threesomes then you may be like a kid in the he candy store with two hunky guys to choose from! Just take it slowly and try and give each guy the same amount of attention.
A word of advice though it is considered bad form after the act to then say to one that he was better than the other, or to start an illicit affair with the cuter one.
If one of the guys seems to be losing interest during the sex, then start paying him a little attention. Sometimes you might find that a couple with a pronounced age difference may pick up younger guys to help satisfy the sexual urges of the younger partner. The older guy may not want to be fully involved and may get off on just watching instead.
There are all sorts of things you can do in a threesome, from sucking two cocks at the same time, to being meat in the sandwich and even having double penetration anal sex!
Another really fun thing to do is to allow yourself to be totally ravaged by two guys, and let them both worship your body all over!
Group situations can be difficult to find, but can be quite a lot of fun when you do find them.
There are a lot of private groups which met on a semi regular basis and you can find ads for these groups in newspapers, on the net and through friends.
An orgy part is usually held at someone’s house and you each pay a small entry fee of a few dollars to pay for condoms.
Sado Masochism conjures up some of the most extreme concepts of torture and pain, but it is not all about pain, it can also include things like:
– Tying your partner up and or being tied up;
– Anal Sex in slings;
– Mild slave / master behavior; and
– Wearing a dog collar.
This section of the guide is only brief and gives very short description and discussion on light S&M only.
probably the most common of all the S&M fetishes, being tied up can be a great sexual experience of submission or can be a great rush of dominance.
Before you go out and tie your partner up though, you need to have discussed this with your partner and agreed upon the boundaries of what you can and can’t do. Also you need to agree on signals and words that mean enough, or untie me, especially if you are role playing!
When you are tying up a boyfriend or partner, you want to make sure than even though he is tied up he is still comfortable and not in any pain.
Don’t use metal wire to do the job as this can cut into the skin and be very painful. Use something like leather harnesses (if you have them), ties, and elastic material. Make it tight enough so he is restrained, but not tight enough to cut off circulation or cause permanent damage.
Never exceed the boundaries of what you have agreed upon, this is rape especially if he says no!
Not everyone gets turned on by tying up or being tied up and some people may totally freak out. Don’t push it!